Relationships

Relationships are always a complicated thing. But they shouldn’t be. In a perfect world, no relationship would ever be complicated. Everything would be an exchange of positive energy for positive energy leaving both people feeling even more fulfilled and happy then they previously were. But it doesn’t always work like that. People are complicated. Emotions are complicated. Which makes relationships complicated.

I’ve started to define my relationships in a new way and it’s really helped me set boundaries for myself and the people in my life. Senses of self-worth and happiness are things that I’ve become extremely protective of. And honestly, if you’re not exchanging positivity for positivity then you’re not getting close to me. That’s that. 

There’s two pieces of every relationship that I’ve started to seriously consider when analyzing whether or not a person should be invested in. Part one is energy and part two is how they relate to the relationship I have with myself. 

This post is going to focus more on platonic and/or family relationships although it can be related to romantic if that’s how it resonates with you. 

You know, it’s a scientific fact that everything is made up of energy. Like, everything. The sky, the ground, the world, the universe—it’s all energy. Even your own heart and thoughts, yes the thoughts that you have in your head, give off an energetic frequency that can be physically measured. That’s why meditation practices and yoga are so beneficial because they change the type of frequencies you give off but anywaaaaay

The way I see it, we all have an energy bubble surrounding us that we give off. I mean, come on it’s a fact that we’re drawn to people that just have that look about them. You know what I’m talking about. They just have those positive vibes and make the world seem a like a brighter place. How many times have you been talking to someone and they just have that glow and you’re left with the impression that you need more? 

The truth is, when we’re aligned with our true self then it’s so positive it’s attracting everything positive back to us. Including positive people and relationships that challenge us to become and grow into the best person we can be. When we’re stuck in our own limiting beliefs or negative self-talk it has that same effect but instead of positive things attracting to us we attract more bad. Consequently, we attract people into our lives that are reaffirming those negative thoughts in our own head causing us to be stuck in a cycle that's nearly impossible to get out of. 

Happiness

I'm gonna start this post by stating that I really don't like the song Happier by Bastille. There's no reason for my dislike of this song other than the fact that it was stuck in my head for the entire duration of me writing and editing this post. So that's all.

Moving on...

Here’s a question that I’ve found myself thinking about for the last couple of years: What does it mean to be happy? 

Here are some other questions that normally follow. 

What makes me happy? Who makes me happy? Who’s job is it to make me happy? Is it my best friends duty? Is it my boyfriends? My family? If I only find happiness when I’m around a select few, is that even real happiness? Is it selfish of me to want others to value my own happiness when they make a decision? Does that mean I don’t value my own happiness, since I’m pushing that job onto someone else? Do I make myself happy? Is there a difference between sober happiness and the happiness that comes when my mind is clouded by whichever substance? Which is real? Or are they both real? Is genuine, prolonged happiness even something that’s obtainable? Will I forever be stuck in quick moments of happiness—thinking back on them when I’m going through the longer moments of mediocrity?

The funny thing is, I sincerely do not know the answers to any of those questions which is probably why I find them going round and round in my head so often. But I guess despite that, despite all the uncertainty… for some reason I’ve truly never been happier in my life than I am right now. 

The Law of Attraction: My First Manifestation Story

I stumbled—literally stumbled—across this concept called the Law of Attraction last May. I’m an avid YouTube watcher and have been for quite some time. When I was in the midst of my depressive state, I was watching a lot of YouTube and this is how I found it. 

It came in a suggested video and I think the title was How to Become Detached and Get Everything You Want or something like that. It peaked my interest right away. I mean, how could it not with a title and promise like that? Well little did I know that this would be the introduction to LoA. And that concept was what would kick-start my process in gaining control of my life again. 

So what is the Law of Attraction? 

Quite simply, the Law of Attraction is the belief that by merely focusing your mind on positive or negative thoughts you will attract those things and things similar to it into your physical existence. A more exciting and romantic way to paraphrase it is this: You can manifest whatever you desire into your physical existence strictly by your thoughts.

The easiest way I like to explain this to people is to think of a time when you just had a really rough morning. Like, you woke up and realized that you never set your alarm and you were running late—your hair wasn’t laying right, you got toothpaste on your black shirt, whatever could go wrong was going wrong and you thought to yourself, “I guess it’s gonna be one of those days isn’t it?” 

So you get in your car and drive to work or school or wherever. Traffic is horrible, they’re playing that one song on the radio that you really just can’t stand, you’re so late to where you’re trying to go and it’s just spiraling and spiraling. 

Here’s what happened: you focused on a negative thought, first thing in the morning and so consequently more negative things found their way into your existence. 

This is the Law of Attraction. 

It’s a hard pill to swallow—I know. We’re conditioned from such a young age that what we want in life must be worked for and earned. We’re never told that we can simply manifest it into existence through our own energy and thoughts. 

I’m assuming that if you’ve never heard of LoA before you’re probably like what is this crazy person talking about. I was apprehensive at first too, but I was also really, really curious. So me, being the (semi)sane minded person that I am was like alright if this is real then I’m going to test this out. I mean, manifesting whatever I want into my life? It sounds like a good deal. So the first question I had as I got my feet wet in this concept was this: Can you manifest specific people into your existence? (Answer: yes, yes you can)

Some background: I was in a situation with a specific person where we were not talking at all, I hadn’t even seen them in months and to me that seemed like a good place to test this out. I picked this person for two reasons: the first being that I was just really attached to them and was actually just really curious to see what would happen if they came back into my life, or even if our paths just crossed again for a moment. The second reason was that I knew there wasn’t a snowballs chance in hell that either of us would reach out to the other so it didn’t seem like this would harm the situation even more to try.